Self

Things you learn about yourself.

Last week I went to get headshots. I have several things coming up that which will need pictures of me. As I scanned back through my photos on my phone, through Facebook and Instagram, and all my files, I discovered there were no picture of just me. Thus, my photo session. I have friend who is great at such things, so I reached out and scheduled an appointment. It is amazing that we are still friends. A photo session may not sound like a big deal to some of you, but for me it was huge. I am not a fan of photos. I do not like anything about being in front of the lens, even with a good friend on the other side. Needless to say, I was not the best subject.

What I learned about myself in this process is a lot. Body image issues don’t go away when you exit your teens. Cameras freak me out! Children need you to be in pictures and they need you to love to be in the pictures. Beauty comes from within—and your friends see your beauty, if you do or not, and they can bring it out in you. I also learned that I am not made to be a model, due to behavior alone!

I received the pictures today. They were great, despite my behavior (y’all, I am not kidding, I was AWEFUL!)

As I went through the gallery I was reminded of a simple truth, God created us all beautifully and perfectly.

This is a truth I know when I look at all the people that I love. It is a truth that I tell my daughters too often to count. But it is truth that I struggle to remember when it comes to myself. Knowing that we are beautifully and perfectly made by God’s own hand and accepting it are two different things.

I hope that if I ever have to do a photo shoot again, that I will enter it without any worry or concern. I hope that I will remember how perfectly God made me, no matter my weight or gray hair, no matter the wrinkles or sunspots. I hope that I will remember the beauty with which God created me and enter with pure joy in the experience (as I am sure the photographer hopes too). I hope that I learn to settle into myself more completely and accept myself more fully as the beautiful and perfectly made child of God that I am!

The journey is not easy but let us find joy on the path!